Monday, January 31, 2011

31/365- Raindrops and yesterdays that become todays

Yesterday I Cried by Iyanla Vanzant

Yesterday, I cried.
I came home, went straight to my room,
sat on the edge of my bed,
kicked off my shoes, unhooked my bra,
and I had myself a good cry.
I cried until my nose was running all over the silk blouse I got on sale.
I cried until my ears were hot.
I cried until my head was hurting so bad
that I could hardly see the pile of soiled tissues lying on the floor at my feet.
I want you to understand,
I had myself a really good cry yesterday.

Yesterday, I cried,
for all the days that I was too busy,
or too tired, or too mad to cry.
I cried for all the days, and all the ways,
and all the times I had dishonored, disrespected,
and disconnected my Self from myself,
only to have it reflected back to me in the ways others
did to me the same things I had already done to myself.
I cried for all the things I had given, only to have them stolen;
for all the things I had asked for that had yet to show up;
for all the things I had accomplished, only to give them away,
to people in circumstances, which left me feeling empty,
and battered and plain old used.
I cried because there really does come a time when
the only thing left for you to do is cry. ...

...Yesterday, I cried.
I cried because I hurt. I cried because I was hurt.
I cried because hurt has no place to go
except deeper into the pain that caused it in the first place,
and when it gets there, the hurt wakes you up.
I cried because it was too late.
I cried because it was time.
I cried because my soul knew that I didn't know
that my soul knew everything that I needed to know.
I cried a soulful cry yesterday, and it felt so good.
It felt so very, very bad.
In the midst of my crying,
I felt my freedom coming,

Yesterday, I cried
with an agenda.

My yesterday was wonderful. Today...not so much. While I haven't sat down to cry with an agenda, by the end of the last class period, I was fighting hard to keep it swallowed. Those lovely little darlings can sometimes reduce me to tears.


  1. :( I wish you had a better day! At least you're off for a snow day tomorrow!!!
    I really thought this picture was amazing. I love the reflection of the tree in the drop- seeing the tree getting runny just LOOKS melancholy. Wow. Great job!

  2. Thank you for the possitive comments and Thank God (or the viracocha ;)) for snow days!

  3. Yes, the drop looks like it's in pain too. Mondays suck crapass sometimes. I'm sorry your day was that way. Call me if you want or need to vent details.

    I saw an interesting raindrop the other day and thought of you both and wishing I had mad skillz like you. It was still liquid but starting to freeze in the middle.

  4. Thanks, Paige. That would have been a cool picture. Are starting to see things the way we do? he he